This year's Christmas is rather memorable..spent it with my family, it was great!!
Received the most prezzies this year with abt 7..hahaha!! but i guess the most happiest thing is that my bro really bought the PSP for me..and he bluffed me say he din buy it..ganged up with my mum and sis to bluff me too..kinda sweet, really feel loved (*not because he bought wat i wanted, but it was the effort and love put into it)

went to school today to hand in biz fin project, rain the whole day sia(*faints).. wanted top use the com in school, but just as expected no space in the lab, i think the school shld get more computers or open up more labs, so that students can use.

Will be going to chalet tmr..hee:) am so looking forward to it man..

am in school working as i'm typing this post. Staying in school for 13 hours straight..Super tired now, but i can't, i only end work at 10pm *faints*
Well the good thing is at least i can now finally do my project.
Anyways i've been working in school since Monday, assembling computers and helping in the reformating of the computers. Tmr coming back to school again to work, siansation, oh wells, bobian i've got to gather all the chances i haf to work this month.
The rain makes me just wanna sleep in and not go to work. hahaha!!

Monday i woke up telling myself, i've gotta give my best in work no matter wat i feel. yea and i found joy working for the past 2 days and of cuz today.

am looking forward to the meet ups tmr and friday..hee:)

sorry everyone i was feeling like crap ytd and today..was very affected by wat happened on friday..i'm sorry if i looked fierce, i tried my best to smile.. but no worries i'm feeling better now..
shedding tears is tiring..
however i still feel its unfair.
Oh wells mayb God has sth better for me.

my 2 weeks break has started, though it'll be as good as no break cuz of projects. but still one good thing is i dun have to wake up so early everyday.

help me to look at things in a new perspective.

played badminton and a little of table tennis today aft law tutorial, before law lecture..hahaha!! neways it felt great, din feel tired at all aft playing, in fact i cld still play somemore..hehe during hols mayb going wataa hse there to play table tennis.
today's playing of badminton and table tennis is a good letting loose time, it felt great, and i felt free from all the work we had to do..

i wanna go to the movies and relax..

you've got to stop treating us like thrash, flaring up for no reason when i am talking to u nicely..you've changed..

the craziness has started again..
having late nights everyday, thank God i get to wake up late tmr..cuz class start at 3pm..phew..
my body is getting weaker and i think am falling sick..hahahaha!!
anyways french oral presentation is over and i screwed up, said the wrong thing, but i managed to correct myself in the end..* according to my fren my mistake was an entertainment. oh and i got back biz finance today, i did better den expected. i tot i'll fail.

let me list down the projects i have on hand now before i stop

1) EFMA
2) Biz finance
3) ICT
4) HRM
5) Marketing mgt
6) Biz law

someone kill me pls..

EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN

ok..i shall blog before proceeding to do my proj..
this week has been a stressful week..oh wells had HRM ICA on thurs, it was like wat my teacher said easy..i hope i can get a good grade..will be getting back results for efma and biz fin next week..

while doing proj halfway today, wataaa send me sth..cuz i looked stressed and i was feeling stressed, oh and she was just sitting 2 coms away from me..

this is wat she sent:
Don't grouch, don't frown.
Learn to lift your edges of your lips to a slight 20 degrees.
Which means that you have to SMILE!!
I hate to see your frustrated face...
neither i want to see you sigh...
cheer up..because there is nothing that you cannot complete...!
all you need is take a break, take a kit kat!!!

it was sweet of her to send me this, when i read it, it can't help but to put a smile on my face..hee:) so thanks again wataa..

am now in my new hse le..yay!!
am back in sweet Bishan..yayness..
anyways i had efma test ytd..hehe it was relatively easy, i din know how to ans the theory qns though, din study that part...oh wells..its alrite am still thankful.
Despite the buziness of this week, really wanna thank God for sustaining me. the many lessons you taught me and the many ppl u put in my life..
i may not be perfect or lovable but you still love me and think the world of me..thank you so much!!

svc today was refreshing, my life is yours. my soul is not my own.
develop my gifts more..
played pool today with val, ruiz and gwen, xinyi was studying and watching us play(*jia you xinyi) anyways i had fun with them. went home with ruiz and i saw ww, pw and yq..hahahaha!! they juz watched finish happyfeet..
aye miss chong! amelia is blessed to haf u in my life. :hugs:

ok am having proj discussion online now and am blogging now..hahahaha!! multi-tasking..

neways the purpose of this post is juz to vent my frustrations(not bcuz of proj but of sth else)..
SCREAMS!!! (*AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaa
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!)

ok done..
argh..am still pissed though, argh dun bother

had biz finance test..ARGH...it was terrible, horrible!!
argh..i just feel like tearing the whole paper up!
Damn..i'm like so screwed lar..
The paper was super trickey lar, and i got cheated
lesson learnt study harder next time.
And i have 4 projects on hand now..hahaha!! i shall look on the bright side of life..
i'll only haf lesser time to play, lesser time to myself..
oh wells it'll be over soon..

amelia is unhappy by the fact that she'll have no holidays aft her exams next year..she haven't had a long break from school since april or so.. the longest break she'll ever get is 2 weeks, which she dun think really count cuz havta do projects. so she'll not have a long break for a year..how wonderful is that..ok enough of talking from a third person's view..well look on the bright side of life, mayb through this i'll learn more of the working life..

why does it have to be this way??

did backstage today tgt with mel.. i haven't really touched bs for quite some time, it felt refreshing today, there's still much to learn, challenges to overcome..
steps to take, puddles to cross.
traps to pull u down,
but there's always a hand there,
to lead u through the steps, across the puddles
and away from traps.

i found mixing was fun last sat..oh how i love the eq of the drums hahaha!! i got wat i wanted. hee:) i'm a happy girl..

i find that i'm slacking in my tutorials, how how how...ahhhh(runs ard room like some mad person). neways i'm having biz law ica this thurs and ict presentation on wed, biz fin and EFMA is next week and HRD is the week after.
i can't believe am in my 5th week of school already. hahaha!! this sem seems shorter, no wait it is shorter..hahaha!! sorry am quite nonsensical right now..

was working today, and i saw my favouritest nonsensical fren arthur wu..hahahaha!!
had ict rehearsal today too, hahaha!! got wataaa! to edit my script. hehe..she's like the editor of all our reports and scripts..

schoolwork aside..
i find mixing for 6 weeks has been a great experience, there were ups and downs however it was a great learning opportunity.

amelia learnt that communication is very impt between musios, singers, mm and soundcrew.
trust is also a very impt factor i guess, thats wat i think..its a personal feeling and i won't elaborate it here..

the very thing i love doing..

the sound box *well part of it hahaha!!

something funny happened today in e-plaza..hahahaha!! oh wells i guess oni jac and jh will noe what's it abt..hehe:P
yes this week has been crazy, however, the next 3 weeks or more will be worse, for it'll be filled with tests, presentations and projects. am still getting used to this crazy life. yes let me repeat am still getting used to this crazy life..i guess the craziness would be more if i dun have the printed tutorials that jac and lilian is doing. life is made easier with them printing the tutorial answers for us.
even if so i shall be diligent and do my tutorials too.

hmmmm..i shall attempt to post some pics now..so if u dun see any pics u'll know am unsuccessful..

ytd i went to Kranji War memorial for my NE project.
pple normally go there very solemn but when my grp members and me go there we very noisy..imagine we took 174 photos in the war memorial.
i'll try to upload some when i can..hahaha!!
somehow going to the memorial, in a way it brought in some feelings.

dun want to tok bout today..lazy..
pretty tired..

the craziness of my life have started.
the things that needs to be done is increasing everyday.
the stress lvl is becoming higher as the weeks pass.
the time for me to meet ppl is lesser.
tutorials that needs to be done everyweek.
the time spent in school is more den the time spent at home.
time spent staring at my lecture notes is more den the time i spent staring at the com and TV.
the time spent listening to lecturers and tutors is more den the time spent listening to my family members.
the times i see the ppl i dun like is more den the times i see my buddies.
tiredness is wat i feel most of the time.

finally am back to post..hehe..
went to Kbox on monday with jac, jh and lilian..hehe we had fun, i finally could sing hei se you mo properly..wat a difficult song to sing.. finally saw a noisy side to lilian(hahaha!!) neways she and jh very high, laugh like siao..and the three of us had fun disturbing jac..

Tues: i had made the decision to go to sentosa with ww, jh, hx, pw and hy last week or is it the week before.. and trust me it was a very difficult decision to make. i guess no matter wat decision i made you guys(both parties) wouldn't understand how i feel. You guys might hate me so am saying sorry.

all in all i had fun, hahahaha!! favourite past-time at the beach is juz soaking in the water, swimming around don't havta kayak or play volley.
din get tanned though :( oh wells..

today: stayed back in school after lectures, to have lunch and study in the library. i managed to finish my HRM and Biz Finance tutorials.i guess jac and me drived lilian crazy in the discussion room with our singing hahaha!! neways aft studying we went down to Food Junction and eat again, cuz hungry..hehe we are pigs. neways we chit chatted alot and gave lilian a educational talk on sth..can die sia..

i guess aft this week, every week will be filled with project discussions, mugging and doing tutorials.

neways am rather proud of myself cuz i did my tutorials, previously when i was in year 1, i normally never do tutorials de, the only tutorial i did was economics..hahaha!! i now want to be good girl..

hey to all people who are sick, rest well!! drink alot of water and dream of me and probably you'll recover faster..hehe jkjk but seriously rest well and take care!!

yea i am back..hahaha!!

choices choices choices..i hate making choices.
to choose between them OR them, if i choose either one, one will be unhappy. wat am i supposed to do?? argh..
nvm dun bother le, go with my feelings.
its so hard to please everyone.

oh my com is not tat cranky le yay!! PTL!!

my com crashed on me=( argh.. dun be puzzled why you don't see me much on msn, neways am in my school lab now..shucks lesson's till 8 tonight..sickening..
neways i got me my adidas bottle le, wahaha!! the one i've been eying for a long long time, i thought i wouldn't be able to get it in the color i want, but i got the color i wanted. hee=)

neways school school has started for 4 days le, projects and assignments are already coming in.
Had my first french lesson on tues, its a cool language, the sad thing is, i dun haf a french teaching me french but a chinese..=( he look like one lao ti gou..hahaha!!

this Sem's modules are rather difficult. i wonder how am i gonna survive. I wonder if am able to meet my goals for this sem..>.<

amelia is sick..
horrible..

Oh i kinda sprained my leg while walking to school today(*clumsy me)

I think am keeping alot of feelings in me..hmmmmm..
argh..

today is the start of school..hahaha!! well..in the 2nd hour of my second class of the day i zoned out..din register wat the cher was saying..gosh..i really pray my attention span will be longer next time..

went for the singers meet ytd to do sound..it was cool..am kinda inspired by them.
laughed alot ytd, craziness...haven't laughed tat much in a long time.

met xinyi today at jurong..oh my..its like a foreign land to me..gosh..ooh and i left my nike water bottle in mac, by the time i realised it was quite late le..saded.. oh wells to look on the bright its an excuse to buy a new bottle..hehe (i can buy the adidas bottle which i've been eying for some time le)

I am just not satisfied with my skills now..i know it's not just based on one time alone, but i've been seeing thruout the many weeks, i've rather been inconsistent. God i ask for your hands to be on me.
I'll strive to improve even more.
I thank you guys who have been teaching me and helping me to understand your instruments better.


neways school starting tmr..bleah..am actually quite excited for it..
first lesson tmr starts at 8am..woah..have to wake up quite early..i hope i dun sleep in class..
hehe will update more nxt time

ytd was the start of my self-proclaimed hols...hehe..
and i got to noe my new timetable ytd, it is horrible, packed like dunno wat lar, but the good thing is i heard we have alot of e-learning sessions.
ohhhhh..i went to Kbox with jacinta today, hehe..i totally enjoyed myself lar, she's good entertainer. I must say that her singing is quite good. we laughed so much ytd. oh and i have a new eye candy(am sure jac u noe who am talking abt).. *faints*
ohhh..and she helps me hit all the high notes..hahaha!! which i can't hit at all..and the remote control u use to choose all the stuff, niao me ytd..*angry* of all things to learn the remote muz learn from lilian..

harlow.......hahahaha!! juz felt like saying tat..oh wells..
my brother bought me my favourite disney character soft toy(*i'm so happy). its CHIP & DALE..they're so adorable..oh my tian..

neways MMD is OVER!! yay!! no need to stare at computer screen using img composer anymore and getting irritated with it and powerpoint..hahaha!! really thank God i'm able to complete it ytd. phew... and nxt week is self-proclaimed holiday!! u know why, cuz no need to go school as the presentation that was suppose to be on nxt tues was brought forward..and i asked my fren to pass up my assignment for me..wahaha!!!

Been rather tired this week...it was rather exhausting..
many things to do this week, haven't rested well too. my stomach is giving me problems again. dunno wat's wrong with it also.

Can say today's exp was rather horrible, din noe it was that bad..kinda sad and disappointed with myself..argh..so many things to take note of and to learn..

anointing flow.. take control

CS role play is now over..wahaha!! 1 load is now off the shoulder..
neways had to put on make up for the roleplay, hee:) many thanks to our make up artiste Jacinta..
it was a great experience(I meant the role play not make up), as i have great grp members, though we may have forgotten some of our lines, we still managed to pull through. and know all our scenes are linked, we din realised that till our teacher told us..hahahaha!! surprisingly i had fun with this project, alot of fun..

with cs proj out of the way, i have to concentrate on my mmd(*DIES) and study for the cs test which is tmr..oh yah i almost died on tues night when i realised i had to hand in my ps report the next day, thank God my friend asked me abt it, and i had my cher's number so i asked her, phew..i rushed home after work, quickly do wat i needed to do and rush my report..den i realised i lost my receipts, thank god can print from the festive team..hee:) so am saved..

ok..i shall get ready to go out to school and fight my battle with mmd le..

obstacle overcomed..no longer will i be overwhelmed and tempted by you..

aye!! yea..ok cs roleplay presentation is this wed..*nervous* pretty afriad that i'll laugh halfway through saying my lines, OMG!! neways had rehearsal ytd, oh my tian, we laugh like so many times lar, but alll in alll it was a good rehearsal, its amazing how much we can achieve even though we may sidetrack many times in our project discussions. i think no grp can achieve as much as us if they were to sidetrack as much as us..hahaha!! neways did i say this before I Love my Proj Grp, which comprises Jacinta, Jiahuey, Lilian and Ziana. A fun bunch of ppl to hang out with..

Oh yah, the biz etiquette class ytd was fun, the tcher is very interesting in her teaching, she has many stories to tell us, she is able to relate the stories to us. She reminds me of my favourite lecturer Miss Teo. hahaha!! they both same kuan one..hee:)

Ok let me now bore u with my experiences in doing sound on sat, i was very nervous on that day esp when the start of pm and svc was approaching, cuz i was gonna do alone, hahaha!! the experience was good. Guess i focused too much on the instruments and kinda neglect the singers. I really thank God all went well, except for some glitches with the soundtracks. but all in all it was a great experience

yay met my buddy ytd...hahaha!!
met xinyi too..wahahaha!! wanted to go mind's cafe, but when we went there it was full, saded can't play my favourite board game and drive xinyi crazy with my craziness..oh wells, so we settled at coffee club instead, i ate muddy mud pie and drank iced mocha vanilla. it was a time if sinful indulgence..
after coffee club, xinyi accompanied me to heeren to meet ruiz, oh i went bonkers outside heeren, i dun understand why but i juz went bonkers...hahaha!! oh wells..

amelia is a happy girl!! meeting up with a good fren and my buddy somehow makes me very happy.

yes!! amelia is no longer internet deprived!!
neways i miss going out with my buddy.
very long nv go out tgt or have dinner tgt le:-(
but its actually because of me, cuz work on tues and thurs. oh wells its ok, i shld be more free aft next week.

neways, been having project meetings everyday aft school, except on those days that i have no lessons. Well, the meetings has been fun, surprisingly we're not exactly rushing our projects. hahahaha!!
oh yah, personal grooming lesson was a bore, wasted my 3 hrs lar.
went to gelere ytd, hahaha!! ate waffer ice-cream with jia huey..ult shiokness, enjoying waffer ice-cream with a good fren.

I'm still adapting to life in my aunt's place, still can't get the time right for going to school, oh wells.. but amelia is a happy girl, i get to eat home-cooked food everyday. lalalala..

been thinking abt sth lately. will it affect us much? hmmmm...
i wanna try sth for mixing the snare drum, i wanna try adding reverb and delay to the snare mix see how it sounds, but somehow am afraid to try.. hahaha!! neways i tot of doing tat while listening to a song. oh wells.. 7 weeks!! here i come!!

been rather lazy to blog lately..hahaha!!
oh did i say i dun like my new class!! i dun feel like its a class, it feels like am attending lectures (*if u noe wat i mean). am thankful for the grp am in now and they are Jiahuey, Lilian, Ziana and Jacinta. i think w/o all of them i wouldn't even want to go for classes sia..am particularly thankful for jiahuey, my closest buddy in class, she's been the one who listens to my nonsense and making my life in school more colorful and vibrant( -_-").

i'll be moving out of my hse this sat :( sad..

was packing my stuff today. in another 10 days i'll be out of my hse(*boohoo)
neways as i was saying i was packing my stuff and i came across all my encouragement cards from my shepherds, sheeps and good buddies of mine.. it brought back much good and not so good memories into me. And am very thankful for all of them in my life.

to all shepherds i thankew for all the time and hardwork u gals have invested upon me, and for always being there for me in times of need for a listening ear, advices.

to all sheeps i thankew for bearing with me and it has definately been a great joy taking care of u ladies.

to all my good buddies i thankew for all the wonderful times spent with u all. and for listening to my nonsense and crappings. and for always being there listen to my rantings, you never know how much it means to me to haf all of u in my life.



anyways there is so many things i wanna do.

i can't sign in to MSN..boooohoooo..
oh wells anyways i forgot to list the good points abt staying in my aunt's place, hahahaha!!!
her place is near town its about half the time i take to travel to town now.. i'll have good food to eat everyday cuz my grams is an awesome cook, she cooks my favourite food, and i won't have to eat packet food(*YAY). tat's abt all the good points i can think of..

oh and today's the first day of all our workshops, it was alrite..Raymond Wong is not as boring as i thought he would be. Am still trying to get use to lessons again, aft all it has been like 5 mths since i had lessons and tests. hahahahahaha!!

Hide me now
Under your wings
Cover me
within your mighty hands

When the oceans rise
and thunders roar
I will soar with you
above the storm
Father, you are king
Over the flood
I will be still
And know you are God

yes when the oceans rise and thunders roar, i wanna be still and know that you are God. And not fix my eyes or focus on the problems or things around me.

Do i truly love the people around me?? hmmmmm..a qns i've been pondering since aft leaving Orchard.

i kinda miss the ppl in CSC hahahaha!! though it might be a torturous place but the ppl in there makes the place a better place.

I wanna make an impact in people's lives with the things that i'm doing. To deliver an experience and not juz an event.

watched the devil wears prada ytd with bee bee, hee:) omg the show is nice, the clothes the ppl wear is like PRETTY!! oh my tian!! hahaha!! neways apart from the movie, i had an enjoyable time with bee bee, am glad to found such a great fren.

my hse is like quite empty now, i got no dining table, my sofa is gone..it feels so empty and big.. moving hse soon, another 2 more weeks and it'll be goodbye. will be going to my aunt's place to stay though, i dunno if i can survive there for 2 months, the internet connection at her hse is like slow and costly, and i need the internet for my school stuff, die la..and its quite inconvenient to go to school from her place too. haiz..am still thinking if i should stay at my dad's place instead, at least his place has fast internet and its easier to go to school(*oni need to take one bus and the time taken will be like the same as now) oh and mayb if am "lucky" enough my father can fetch me to school. And if i stay at his place i can have more late nights too(cuz more freedom mah). Though my aunt's place is nearer to town, i can't reach home late, i guess the latest i can reach is like 10..(DIE!!).. tell me wat to do.. choose wat?? tag me to answer me (in a dilemma).
to stay at aunt's place or to stay at my dad's place?? (* my mum allows me to stay at my dad's if i want to)

metamorphosis is over(*phew)

neways zoo hunt is tonight..am rather nervous..first time doing for hope kids, it'll be a great experience.

tmr am meeting ermander and bee bee!! yay!!!
meeting piggy and mama too. so long never see them le..

neways let me tell u abt ytd, my heart almost stoped beating, brain stop working when the eguit got no sound, den when have sound got no distortion, den i realised no effects box, i felt helpless cuz i can't do anything, i can't run down, for there wasn't anyone with me at FOH. thank God for Simon, thank God he had his effects box in backstage and managed to help the eguit to have distortion(*phew).
I thank God the concert ytd was a success too.

ytd night as i was going home, i kinda felt upset over some things. As i replayed the happenings in my mind, i tot to myself could things have been done a better way. was caught in a dilemma too..

but now as i think back, i wanna thank God for all that has happened ytd, i thank God for mel, hannah and xueyong for serving with me ytd. they've all improved and am proud of them..

lessons started today, haiz...my gawd..i almost died in the two 2hrs lecture today..so bored..thank God Ms Cindy Soh's lecture wasn't as bad as the morning lecture..

argh..quite lazy to go school today haha!!

met jia today, yea, i enjoy the time spent with her.

oh and simon's way of laughing is funny, he can start and stop juz like tat..-_-"

yay meetin ruiz tmr..hahahaha!!
metamorphorsis on wed
and zoo hunt on thurs..

yay!! my mummy cooked my favourite soup today...HAHA!! its salted veggie duck soup *drools* good food today...hahahaha!!

neways!! CSC is over!! my gawd, do u noe how happy am i that its over?? on the last day i was like crazy crazy and crazy, i very long never been so crazy in school le, except during lunch time when i meet jiahui for lunch den i'll be high..hahaha!! neways we went pizzahut to eat, nice food.

played badminton today, hahaha!! am amazed that i pespired so much, haha!! i had so much fun today..

i am a happy girl..sound ytd was not bad, was quite stressed abt it..hahaha!! oh wells, am glad i have learn some things too..hee:)

yesh! this cannot go on any longer. I am determined to overcome this obstacle.
and it feels so much better now.
someone is watching over me and i noe it.

there's so many things i gotta grow in, i gotta learn to open up more.

visit a dear fren of mine ytd. it hurts me soo much to see her suffer lyk dat, but well the good news is that she's gonna get better soon!! yea!! *jumps around in joy*

i wonder wat's the feeling like to get drunk, haa..must be awful i guess, drank 2 cups of vodka mixed with rootbeer ytd, aft the 2 cups, my body felt super hot, hahaha!!

neways many thoughts have been going thru my mind lately, how i wished of many things.
i need someone to talk to, someone who hear my hearts cry, someone who i feel safe talking with.

been thinking alot abt my past lately...dunno why am thinking of it too...i realised how ugly i was last time, not physically but internally, i can't help but to think how stewpid i was for doing all the things i did..the way i spoke the unkind words to ppl. how dumb how dumb, the sucidal thoughts i had last time when i was still young but not so innocent..i can't help but to ask myself why why why..

was thinking abt my family too, how complicated my family bg is, there's more to it den meets the eye, if u think i was from a beautiful family u were wrong soo soo wrong.. it still amazes me to see where am i now..can u believe am now in POLY!! hahaha!! i noe u may say that am more fortunate den many out there, i dun deny that i am.
i think my brother has changed he's no longer the same as before, the bond is no longer there, even so with my sister, somewhere inside of me does not want to relate to my siblings anymore, its feels as though am avoiding them, why is it so, what is pulling me back?? it feels like i dun noe them anymore.

when i boarded the bus juz now after dinner, i saw this man who reminded me of my grandfather and how much i miss him!!

neways i feel we're drifting apart, in fact i dunno if we're ever close before..

i miss BM0503, all the crazy dudes!! FATTMOULD, is it juz gonna be this way, all going different ways and never meet up ever again??

Bonds are bulit but broken, so what's the use of buliding them when its going to break anyways. is this how friendships shld be like, if it is den i rather be alone. what happened to friends forever, they are juz but empty promises..

sorry for being to emo..

I had a blast mixing this week *eyes sparkle with delight*. i felt i did a great job last sat *gives myself a pat on the shoulder* hehe..
aft svc went to esplanade to celebrate simon's bday, hahaha!! oh wells got to noe him more thru what ppl said..hee:) was quite zombiefied aft svc. oh and we played one of puay violent games, it was quite fun, haha!!
oooooohhh, sunday was a wonderful day, went east coast cycling with ermander, bee and ting, *wo lao le* i cycled very slowly, hahaha!! trying to enjoy the scenery around me and the breeze blowing into my face, so din felt like cycling fast, if i did i think i'll be like dying from muscle aches now..
i realised we made alot of plans hahaha!! never thought that in the 6 weeks, anyone would haf bonded, but look. hee:) i hope this bond we shared will not stop aft CSC.

i think i've grown, been struggling with a certain thing lately, but i've decided in my heart not to succumb to the temptation am feeling. yes!! i noe thru this testing i'll grow to a new lvl.

how fast this week has passed, you know wat does that mean? it means in another 2 weeks i'll be out of CSC *jumps arund the room like some crazy person*

guess i'll miss saying this "hi good morning/afternoon my name is amelia, i'm calling on behalf of singtel to conduct a customer satisfaction survey on your last visit to the Hello! shop. This survey will only take about 5 mins of your time. May i proceed now?"

most importantly i'll miss the pple, its kinda early to say all these, but who cares. all the running aways from yanting and amanda..hahaha!!
oh wells..

*why dun u believe me?!?*

went for a ex-classmate's chalet on sunday, i had fun, had bbq. din cook at all, was served..hahaha!!cuz me and my other frens dunno most of the ppl there. so yea..but still i had fun, had 2 mahjong session, one during midnight, the other in the morning. celebrated my fren's bday aft mahjong. it was quite memorable. hahaha!! din sleep at all, went to Kbox, sang our hearts out, hahaha!! went home aft kbox, looked like zombie and i slept like a pig on the bus...first time i slept so soundly on a bus..hahaha!!

Went for cg before going for the chalet, what can i say, i felt refreshed during worship. and teaching. the extremist, which side are u on??

oh yah i went for the planetshakers concert, was quite disappointed in a way. i shall not comment much.

*beneath this smile lies sth deeper

Saying goodbye
It's never easy
Sometimes love
Is a fair weather friend
Just when you thought
It was forever
Your whole world
It comes to an end
You know I've felt like this
I've been there before
And there is one thing I know

It's better to love
Than feel the pain
Than to hide
Your love away
Cause I'd rather feel
I'd rather cry
It's better to love

I see you're hurt
And I know your reasons
Its only a matter of time
Before your heart can
Find sweet love again
And give you the courage to fly
You know I've felt like this
I've been there before
And there is one thing I know

It's better to love
Than feel the pain
Than to hide
Your love away
Cause I'd rather feel
I'd rather cry
It's better to love

Some people run away
Let love just fade away
And end up with nothing at all
It's better to love

I'd rather feel
I'd rather cry
It's better to love

It's better to love
Than feel the pain
Than to hide
Your love away
Cause I'd rather feel
I'd rather cry
It's better to love

Cause I'd rather feel
I'd rather cry
It's better to love
It's better to love

ytd was the first time in 3 weeks that i woke up after 10 am..wah...shiokness..
last friday and sat was more shiok, i've never had so much fun in a very long time..friday was spent with a dear friend of mine and sat spent with my cg.

wahaha!! sat we went to celebrate Ben's bday at marinabay. eat till we smelly..hehe -_-".
after eating we went bowling, if u see me play u can see how lousy i am. haha!! oh after bowling we went to the arcade and we played daytona!!! my favourite arcade game besides air hockey. so sad my car overturned alot of times. but still i had fun. oh and we walked to the mrt station. the journey was long, and i enjoyed myself walking back tgt with wyn my walking partner.

yesh!! Amelia is smiling again. am having a different perspective of work now. am thankful for that. seriously the feeling of hitting 20 completed surveys is quite nice. felt very accomplished.
the Singtel person is coming today to hear our call argh..i hope i get a good person to survey later, not a problematic one. hehe..

I made a promise never to settle
Why didn’t I keep it?
Cause I hated the heartbreak
Crying and cheating, the fooling around

I’m not missing you
I’m not going through the motions
Waiting and hoping you call me
I’m not missing you
You might have had me open
But I must be going because I got life to do
I know I’m usually hanging on
I used to hate to see you gone
But this time it’s different
I don’t even feel the distance
I’m not missing
I’m not missing you

No I can’t be with you
Cause I'm scared felt like I was falling when you left me
I can’t keep going through life
Unaware of what I missed
And the person I could be
Love's good when it’s right
And when it's left in your memory
All the times I let you down
I guess love will be nice for someone else's life

CSC is really commit suicide center..i guess working in a call center is really horrible, now its one profession that i will never consider going for an interview. have been dragging my legs to school for the last week and today. argh, having headache now. i still have abt 16 call to make before i complete the current list i have.

I have been rather quiet lately, dun feel like talking much..

got no feeling..

I JUZ WANT TO GET OUT OF THIS PLACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGH!!! @$&%^*!^@&#*

i've decided to have another blog which will be private for me, wahaha!! i'll input there all my emotions and feelings, oh wells this blog will still be around, but of course i won't share deeply here.
i woke up on the wrong side of bed today, sianz, got screamed out of bed today, cuz my bro came home drunk and my mother ask me to go downstairs to find my brother's wallet, and one side of his shoe, kaoz was freakingly pissed lar. argh my beauty sleep gone just like dat. but neways i can't find his things, haiz suay sia..
neways CSC is equals to "commit sucide center", have been given extra workload ytd, i have to call like extra 34 ppl. argh.. watever, dun think i'll be able to finish it today..am like dragging my feet to school/work(watever u want to call it) everyday, i hope these 6 weeks faster be gone.

Haven't been feeling good lately, but somehow as i think abt the wonderful times i share with my frens and cg, it brought a smile to my face. Got reminded of the wonderful ppl i have in my life to share my woes and joy.

Today is my first day in CSC, oh wells we did role play today.
its quite fun but yet tiring cuz hafta keep saying the same thing over and over again for more den 20 times..talked till my mouth dry liao..
the worse thing is i haf to call my tcher tmr to do a role play with her, cuz she say my opening is too fast.*dies* I hope she doesnt give me killer qns tmr sia..
Haiz..aft going thru today, i realised how good BSU really is.
i miss that office of mine.

Today is my last day at BSU..hais..guess i'll miss room A302a..and the lingering presence of Miss Ong behind the admin table.

Neways PT3 though am not in ur grp, but it feels like i belong there..
Juz wanna say sth to leader and chicken.. won't be seeing them le..not in the same lecture grp..):

Leader: Oei am always around, dun cry yea..still can play with amelia, neways its been great having a great and caring fren like u..

Chicken: Norafiza Binte Mohd Basri!! hahaha!! previous owner, u and arthur good ah..suan me like some crazy person. neways knowing u in TEP is fun yea..dun forget me sia..i want ur songs

today is like emo day lar, so many ppl cry and first time i see leader cry, i almost died when she started crying infront of me (dunno wat to do). lesson learnt:never cry infront of amelia.
guess i'll miss yee shih and devi too, my two working partners. i'll miss toking to them.

The truth is tearing up my heart
I can't recognise this place
The endless road without a stop sign
Can't even find a stranger this time

Why am I still holding back my tears
In this loneliness there's nothing left to fear
Every chord still seems a wonder
How we could be together
Everytime I ask if this would be the last
Why am I still talking to myself
Hoping you will have the keys to my cell
Every song might calm the weather
But it just draws me deeper
How do I get out of this
I think~ I never will

A crystal forming in the eye
Maybe this would be the last
The winding path down my face
Till I begin to taste the bitterness inside

Why am I still holding back my tears
In this loneliness there's nothing left to fear
Every chord still seems a wonder
How we could be together
Everytime I ask if this would be the last
Why am I still talking to myself
Hoping you will have the keys to my cell
Every song might calm the weather
But it just draws me deeper
How do I get out of this
I think~ I never will I never will

pain is all am feeling now..
i feel so dumb, why din i see it coming, haiz all becuz of that i hurt myself.
yes..i fell down today while crossing the road to school, din see the bus turning in, and when i found out it was too late, my leg fell into the drain, now i got a big bruise and a disgusting looking cut.

neways other apart from my big fall amelia is a happy girl, cuz am juz happy..hahaha!!!

took leave today, am now at home. hahaha!! had a great sleep.

neways PEPPERLUNCH IS LIKE SUPER NICE LAR, thinking of it, is making me drool. haha!!

amelia is very tired this week, thank God i could still take leave today to rest.
Been rather busy in school lately with reports to do, ppt presentation..haiz.. at least there's stress reliever called puzzle fighter. playing with arthur can make me vomit blood though, ahh..hahaha!! but its fun to play and talk with him..
this is quite weird but i kinda miss the office..
ironically i can't wait to get out of the office and yet i miss it..ha!!

favouritest day of this week was monday and today.
monday met with ruiz aft school, had a great time with her and am glad to have great frens like her.

today cuz its rest day and having shpding later and of cuz music prac..hahaha!! i love going for prac :)

amelia is now blogging in school.

watched the match between Germany and Argentina on friday night, i almost had a heart-attack tat night when argentina scored the first goal, i was at the edge of my seat during the 2nd half. oh wells Germany won in the end, hehe..yea i can see more of Podolski, my favourite player.

neways been thinking bout some things lately.

haaa!

random facts about me

1) loves music
2) forgetful
3) wols
4) loves to play games
5) 19years old
6) sound engineering
7) tanned

7 things that scare me

1) losing my best friends
2) losing my sense of hearing and sight
3) crockroaches
4) losing my family
5) failing m exams
6) Beetles
7) losing my freedom

7 random music at the moment

1) Don't Speak
2) emotions
3) Low
4) amazed
5) one love
6) stuck
7) meant to live

7 things i like the most

1) my close friends
2) anime
3) mP3
4) my dog (qiqi!!!)
5) going out with friends and family
6) my family
7) singing

7 things i say most

1) haha
2) heh?!
3) haHaa
4) hei Hei
5) i seeee
6) despise you
7) OMG

7 ppl to do this

i dunno who to put, so whoever who wants to do juz do it lar..

i need more patience, humility, faith and love.

amelia is very feeling encouraged and happy. hahaha!!

i had fun mixing ytd though i was abit stressed at first but everything worked out great, there was a breakthrough in my mixing ytd.. neways have many more things to improve in.
God understands us!! and the best part is he thinks the world of me.

CG today was a great time of fellowship and a time of learning. Feel so refreshed.
aft cg today went out to haf lunch, den went with Daniel, EC and Ian to cityhall to see guitars, woah i learnt much abt guitars from them today, its so interesting. And of cuz talking to them more is great. learnt much talking to them, yeah and i think i shld fellowship more with the musios. build stronger bonds with them.

Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party.
After several drinks, one of the men had to use the restroom.
Those who remained talked about their kids.
The first guy said, "My son is my pride and joy. He started working at a successful company at the bottom of the barrel. He studied Economics and Business Administration and soon began to climb the corporate ladder and now he's the president of the company. He became so rich that he gave his best friend a top of the line Mercedes for his birthday."
The second guy said, "Darn, that's terrific! My son is also my pride and joy. He started working for a big airline, and then went to flight school to become a pilot. Eventually he became a partner in the company,where he owns the majority of its assets. He's so rich that he gave his best friend a brand new jet for his birthday."
The third man said: "Well, that's terrific! My son studied in the best universities and became an engineer. Then he started his own construction company and is now a multimillionaire. He also gave away something very nice and expensive to his best friend for his birthday: A 30,000 square foot mansion."
The three friends congratulated each other just as the fourth returned from the restroom and asked:"What are all the congratulations for?"
One of the three said: "We were talking about the pride we feel for the successes of our sons... What about your son?"
The fourth man replied: "My son is gay and makes a living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub." The three friends said: "What a shame...what a disappointment."
The fourth man replied: "No, I'm not ashamed. He's my son and I love him. And he hasn't done too badly either. His birthday was two weeks ago, and he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot mansion, a brand new jet and a top of the line Mercedes from his three boyfriends."

-_- hehe stupid story

hahahaha!! amelia is bored so she's blogging, the office is so quiet today, project 3 is out on mystery shopping, no one to fight with me today. most of the ppl are on block leave, i wonder why do they even bother asking us to come back to school when most students and teachers are on leave. haiz..stupid school system..

oh wellz..the oni 2 things am looking forward to is lunch time and going home time. i seriously dun see the point in coming to school this week.

am filled with disappointment. i dunno if i shld laugh or cry for the person.


i enjoyed myself so much in retreat ytd, spending time with the soundteam is so refreshing, i feel so encouraged aft each retreat. am loooking forward to seeing more ppl joining us in our family.

today is stay at home day for amelia. father's day dinner was moved to sat instead, and other plans were cancelled, no mood to go out today.

i hope my suspicions of a certain someone is wrong and that am just being over-sensitive..haiz..troubling sia

oh yay!! having sound retreat tmr(which is actually today judging from the time that am typing this)!! hahaha!! going mel's hse, so fun!! am sooooo excited. am soo looking forward to fun and fellowship with the team.

went to the libray ytd and on monday, i had fun reading there, thinking of going there again on friday after lunch since i dun intend to meet anyone. hehe self retreat there.

met carol and ah lin ytd too, they went shopping and i just followed, if u noe amelia well, she dun like going shopping, hahaha!! but den again if its going with my good buddies i won't mind shopping..hee:)

had training today, it was a time of reminding and a time of hearing Steven's heart for the ministry. He places God in the center of what he's doing. Really wanna learn more from him. a Godly man indeed.

ignite was simply awesome, guess one thing i learn from the last night of camp was to trust and to let go. and am thankful for being reminded of the word trust.

though i oni went for one day of camp, the experience was awesome, imagined if i were to be there for the full camp, it'll be an experience i can't describe.

had fun playing blind mice, craziness, the guys are scaryyyyy esp walz and ben, oh my, super scary mice..hahaha!! laughed like mad while playin though. its funny the way how the blind mice guess who they have caught.

i shall stop here or else i'll have to sit in front of my com for a very long time to think of wat to write. hee:)

I had fun being the emcee at the sharing session on wednesday, at the end of the sharing session my friends told me that i had split personality. Oh and i was told to presnet 30 minutes before the start of the session as the presenter had to bring a friend to the doctor at the last minute, so you can imggine how nervous i was and how bad my presentation was..hahaha!!


I had fun at practice ytd too, doing everything alone is quite fun though i felt quite stressed and afraid that i couldn't be efficient. well, practice went smoothly ytd. Thank God for that.

yay met ruiz for lunch today and on monday..hee:) super happy, been quite some time since i really enjoyed my lunch. hee:)

Oh my 2 partners aren't here today, am all alone at my desk, i dun feel lonely though, i can spend time by myself.

looking forward to service tmr and to meeting xinyi for shepherding on sunday yea!


i've got the joy
i've got the peace of mind
i've got the faith in holy ghost that fills me everyday
i've got the light
i've got the melody
i've got the word
The word of God that sets me free

Bless the Broken Road

I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you

Chorus:
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true

Chorus:
Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

Now I’m just rollin’ home into my lover's arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you

i have a sudden urge to seclude myself for a few days or maybe for a whole week. neways i juz want to spend time alone away from ppl.. juz me, myself with my music and God. can't wait for my block leave.

I just feel that its all so superficial, it feels that it doesn't matter if i relate with anybody at all.



i juz went to batam on sunday, finally bought myself a new shoe, i love it alot lar, i think my taste is weird lar, my sis says its not nice, but i think it's nice lar, neways it doesn't matter cuz i bought it le. hahahaha!! Missy Elliot rocks man!

my stomach feels like crap now, this few days it has been super weak lar. think my period is coming soon. i keep getting tired easily and a little bit of moodswings.

Am starting to drag myself to school now every morning, i feel so out of place in the place where am posted to.

i needa get of the place that am in..

ending here.

feelings are bottled inside,
i dunno how to let them out,
everything is driving me crazy.
nothing seems right anymore.

Students in TEP esp in my department haf top 3 favourite things to do 1) play bingo, 2) play puzzle fighter, 3) ask qian bian wen da ti..hahaha!! now u noe how bored we are..

oh wells am losing my voice, haiz...my voice very nan ting now, dun feel like talking..
i think i was quite blur today, i made loads of mistakes, mis-cue some stuffs..

here's a song that spoke to me.

Jesus take the wheel
She was driving last Friday on her way to Cincinnati
On a snow white Christmas Eve
Goin' home to see her Mama & her Daddy with the baby in the backseat
Fifty miles to go and she was running low on faith and gasoline
It's been a long hard year
She had a lot on her mind and she didn't pay attention
She was going way to fast
Before she knew it she was spinning on a thin black sheet of glass
She saw both their lives flash before her eyes
She didn't even have time to cry
She was so scared
She threw her hands up in the air

[Chorus:]
Jesus, take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this on my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on
Jesus, take the wheel

It was still getting colder when she made it to the shoulder
And the car came to a stop
She cried when she saw that baby in the backseat sleeping like a rock
And for the first time in a long time
She bowed her head to pray
She said I'm sorry for the way
I've been living my life I know
I've got to change So from now on tonight

[Chorus:]
Jesus, take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this on my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on
Oh, Jesus, take the wheel
Oh, I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
Save me from this road I'm on
From this road I'm on
Jesus, take the wheel
Oh, take it, take it from me

amelia is a happy girl this week!!
hee..lets see, my favourite activity to do during my TEP working hours is to play BINGO, so next time when pple ask me wat i do in TEP and what i've learnt out of TEP, my ans for them is I LEARNT TO PLAY BINGO!!

yep! wells this week had been fun, got to know the ppl in my department better(not so shy le) hee..been rather tired lately,thank God, there's a long weekend this week for me to rest..

today's sermon was great, it really touched me, our prayer life muz be strong so we can strengthen our inner-man. The things happened today really reminded me of somethings in my life.

Today's the first day of TEP, well, it was a day filled with confusions. When me and my team mates arrived we were at a lost of wat to do. We din noe where the folders were hahaha!! with much patience, we managed to find the folders. Today we were quite busy, that's a good thing, oh we have photo taking session tmr, cuz we need to consolidate the list of students tgt with their photos and contact details. I sense that tmr will be another busy day..
Somehow i feel thankful for being placed in HR/Admin, i get to work tgt with my 2 grp mates closely and we can get to noe alot of ppl..hahahaha!!

Oh i had so much fun sound mixing for service on sat!! hehe..though i made a few boos boos.. I really feel that i love the sound team more and more, as weeks passed am filled with more ownership of the team.
Am overwhelmed with the depth of God's love. The story of Nicodemus reminded me of how God has blessed my family. It refreshes my heart to be reminded of that.

am so thankful.

What am i so thankful for?
-for reminding me of his faithfulness in my life
-for the many ppl God has placed in my life to speak into my life
-for the opportunity to serve

I just got to know where i'll be working at for TEP(teaching enterprise project), am in BSU(business service unit) doing HR/admin. haiz..i think its like a super wu liao job, i'll be oni busy in the morning den aftnoon zuo bo..wahaha! think it'll be a blessing in disguise cuz i'll have alot of time, hehe mayb when i really have nth to do i can sneak off to the back of the office and learn how to play dota(wahahaha!!) oh wells..amelia is a smart girl..

I trult thank God for last week, had a great rest last week and reading of his word. I think my God is an amazing God, for loving us unconditionally no matter how much we haf hurt him..Thank You Lord!

school is starting nxt week, surprisingly i kinda look forward to going to school, guess cuz am gonna learn in a new environment. yeah..I pray that i can use my free time in the office wisely. yeah!

I juz realised qiqi is pretty good at attracting attention. haha she's very good at getting u to play with her.. am amazed, it takes alot of concentration not to get distracted by her, its funny but its true.hahaha!!

am looking for nice nike dunks, ahhh!! hehe..
gonna get converse shoes too..yeah!

truly ministered today in sermon, God is a God of 2nd chance. He's a God of extreme love, mercy, forgiveness. wow(heart melt melt). Words fail me when i really want to say how God has really been with me and his love for me..

Met up with piggy and ah lin ytd night, really had fun with them, though it was just a short time we spent tgt. wah sei, kanna tortured lar, i think now i got bruise on my hands haiz..hehe..

Things at home is still bad, the cold war is still on, this sucks big time. Wondering when it'll stop. I realised its almost always the same matter they quarrel about. haiz, when will my family ever feel like a family, sometimes i feel if i manage to see my sister's face, like often it'll be a miracle.

Watched V for Vendetta ytd night, i loved it alot. Haha!! my favourite quote is People should not be afraid of their goverments. Goverments should be afraid of their people. yeah..learn many things from this movie too. wahaha!! i shall not eloborate here, lazy lar..

Why does quarrels have to be always about money money money? Am sick and tired of this blabbering about money money money. wat am i suppose to do rob a bank? Mummy and my sister quarreled over money matters again. Haiz, am always the one in middle, the victim of their quarrel, consequence is i have to listen to my mother's nagging, and her nagging will turn into scoldings. This will go on for days. I can so bang my head against the wall. When my pay comes in i can't spend it in a way that i planned, since school is starting and my bro is coming back soon, i have to support myself someway or another.
Now is a really good time for me to go someplace and just let it all out.

You are the strength of my heart
You are the strength of my heart
You are the strength of my heart

had the most memorable bday celebration today at sentosa, guys i really appreciate it alot, truly encouraged by what was being shared and the cards too..thankew guys!!
hehe..neways my face got smashed into the cake today, and the strange thing is i knew that they were going to do it, but den i still allowed it to happen, because i knew that i confirm can't escape de..hahaha!! silly me...

i really enjoyed mixing ytd, though i feel stressed during the first svc, but i had fun in the 2nd svc doing the instuments..hehe..hahaha!! so happy..Amelia is a happy girl. oh rite, played pool ytd, was totally not on form ytd, almost everytime i hit i miss. haiz.. oh yesh, learnt much from Pastor Ben's sermon ytd too, total recall, wow, we are all God's masterpiece and he ain't finish with us yet. isn't it amazing that God's motivatedy his love, mercy and grace that he save us?

am in school now..
hahaha!! working sia from 9-6(9hrs), hahahaha!! can die, but i can do alot of stuffs..i shall use the 9 hrs to read and to think abt things.

crap! i forgot wat i wanted to type..argh..silly me..oh yah i juz remb one thing, am having my tep first, haiz..sian..oh wells its ok, i still have to go through it no matter wat, since am doing it first, i should make the most out of it..yea..

wah..i no inspiration to type le..
omg i actually thought alot of things i wanted to type de, but when i sit infront of the com to type, i forgot everything, haiz wat rubbish.

my results are finally out..
PRINCIPLES OF ACCOUNTING- B+
MICROECONOMICS- C+
STATISTICAL METHODS FOR BUSINESS- B+
PRINCIPLES OF MARKETING- B
EFFECTIVE WRITING SKILLS- C
BUSINESS SOFTWARE APPLICATIONS- B+

wahaha!! though it doesn't seem that fantastic, i am very satisfied with my results. first time in my life am really satisfied with my results. yeah, now i can really party w/o worries. i was really afraid that i would have to take supp paper. Thank God.

was at the poly camp on tues and wed, it was a fantastic time of serving in sound and a wonderful time of learning the word, though i din have the notes but am really blessed with the teachings.

Called to be salt and light
Called to preserve and shine

this song is really stuck in my head..hahaha!!

yay am going to Kukup this Sat, haha!! good seafood here i come!!

oh wells the 2 mths of training has started, pretty stressed, i noe thru this time of training i will definately improve in many ways, truly thank God for Jia too, for being patient in explaining the things i havta improve in.

results are coming out soon!! this thurs. ahhhhh!! very scared..

ohhh..had gals nite out ytd at Puay's hse i had so much fun playing pool. I havta to play 2 rounds before i get the feeling..hahahaha!! oh and we had self made fondue too..nice..the strawberries were super big lar. craziness.

am like not elaborating on anything..hahaha!! no mood lar.

You Don't Miss A Thing

You know my motives
You know my heart
No matter what I'm doin'
You see my secrets
Right through the dark
Who do I think I'm foolin'?
You watch me runnin'
You let me hide
'Cause You know where I'm goin' to
Seeking me
Reaching me
Keeping me in Your care, Lord
I can't escape it


You don't miss a thing I do
You see every move I make
But You know everything I need
You don't let a care get by You
You don't miss a thing, do You?

When my heart's broken
You dry my tears
'Cause You know what I'm feeling
When I am frozen
You melt my fears
Your gentle love is healing
You feed my hunger
You quench my thirst
'Cause You are my provider
Leading me
Teaching me
Keeping me in Your care, Lord
I can't escape it


You don't miss a thing I do
You see every move I make
You know everything I need
You don't let a care get by You
You hear every word I say
I will never go unnoticed
'Cause You don't miss a thing, do You?

You don't miss a thing... no, no ,no...

overjoyed is the word to express wat am feeling now..woah..haven't felt like this for a very long time..this feeling is awesome..
worship today is really powerful cld feel God moving.
we will crown him king forever
living saviour, Jesus redeemer
Lord of heaven robed in majesty
crowned in glory creations adore you

sermon was powerful too, we have the password, use it. dun live life like a begger, we are rich in God's blessing, live them out.

i juz dunno wat to type, in my head now is wow...i am speechless.

feeling not so good now..haiz..
getting results on 16 March, seriously my confidence in passing with flying colors is like zero.
I feel tat i'll be so disappointed in myself aft getting my results, its as if i never really did my best in studying for the exams, i juz couldn't remb anything when i entered the exams hall. ahhh!! watever..

irritated!! i can so slap someone left right center..

on a brighter note celebrated Candy's Birthday today, Happy Birthday gal, dun think she'll be reading this though. Oh wells, we went Cafe Cartel at Marina Square and made a fool of ourselves there. I shall never step foot in that Cafe Cartel. Aft that we went Bowling, i was so not on form today, my performance was disappointing. We went Esplanade to take fotos (trust me we took alot alot alot..)

ok i shall not carry on anymore or i'll start scolding ppl on my blog which is not very good.

My holidays have started, but why don't i feel happy aww man..
where have my carefree days gone??

Who Am I?? I am uniquely made by God. My tag says made in heaven.

all this while the negative things i feel or think has taken its toll on me..than on tues as i was at home by myself, i listened to draw me close and really prayed to God to draw me back to him. I guess in my very sinful nature i want to feel loved and the busy schedule i had, added to the amt of stress i feel.. Den i realised i forgot the basic of my spiritual life, taking care of my walk God. yea..i shld go east coast and haf a retreat with God at the jetty. i feel most relaxed there.. many other things i want to share but i can't pen them down here..

WE ARE PRECIOUS TO GOD!!

will anybody ever understand how amelia feels?
the only source of comfort at home i have other than God is my dog..
I want to be loved, i noe i am by God, but how abt the people closest to me, my family??
Sometimes i just dun feel like going home, the words that will come is when are u going to work? they never ask is everything ok? how's school? are u coping well?
Tired, just so tired of studying..deep within me i just want to quit school..
maintaining contact with my secondary school frens is tiring, dun they feel my sincerity in wanting to meet them, all i get is their cold reply..mayb u guys shld organize an outing and i'll give u the same respond.
I need a friend who'll juz ask me out to east coast, cycling and enjoying the sea breeze together and just talking about anything under the sky..
a voice screaming in my heart: I miss the carefree life i once had..



Hanging out with Ruth, ah li, jess, david and BK ytd really brought back much memories, and how much i really miss them..

the real me?? who am i really?
the meaning of life? what's the true meaning of it?
Love? really what is it all about?
true friends? how do you know if they are your true friends?
friends are easy to find, but who among them are your true friends?

One last report to go and this semester's projects will be done..yea..this is now the last week of school for me. den it'll be one week of study break and it'll be examinations!! wow..this semester went by so fast. Can't wait for the exams to be over sia..I want to be stressfree...

somehow i kinda miss North D peeps.. the ppl who kinda grew up with me..hahahaha!!

A little encouragement goes a long way.
Given at the right time it can lift a person up.


I was so nervous ytd while doing sound, i've never felt so nervous before..guess it was pretty obvious tat i was nervous as i was not as crazy as i'm normally am..hahahaha!! yep..
oh wells, yay!! had cg today, it feels so good to be there today. yeah!! refreshed, God teach me to be more aware and to listen more..

When was the last time u praised someone??

i seem quieter now as compared to last time..hahaha!! dun talk as much le..hmmmmm....

oh well i enjoyed serving backstage today very much, juz loving love teaching backstage sound to the new ppl in the sound ministry, i find it a joy to teach wat i noe and wat am passionate abt to them. guys ask more qns!! i may not be able to ans all of them but i'll try..

one thing i really learn about this week is loving God with all my heart and being aware of my feelings, with the many projects and presenatation and the many things happening at home, i really found myself to be very tired, moody and really just sick of wat's going on around me, during wam vision's nite as i was alone in backstage listening to Jasmine's teaching wat she said really hit me alot, feelings can be our best fren and it can be our worse enemy, we haf to be aware of our feelings. And the next day as i did my QT the verse about loving God with all our heart juz hit me, and i realised i seemed to haf forgotten my first love.

really thank God for teaching me all these , and of reminding me tat he's there all the time waiting to intervene when we call for him..

as i was going home ytd i listened to this song, and was reminded how God watches u even as changes/obstacles come, waiting to come in and see us thru those obstacles and changes,and how he renew us when we're tired, his reconstruction works in us.

Every evening sky, an invitation
To trace the patterned stars
And early in July, a celebration
For freedom that is ours
And I notice You
In children's games
In those who watch them from the shade
Every drop of sun is full of fun and wonder
You are summer

And even when the trees have just surrendered
To the harvest time
Forfeiting their leaves in late September
And sending us inside
Still I notice You when change begins
And I am braced for colder winds
I will offer thanks for what has been and what's to come
You are autumn

And everything in time and under heaven
Finally falls asleep
Wrapped in blankets white, all creation
Shivers underneath
And still I notice you
When branches crack
And in my breath on frosted glass
Even now in death, You open doors for life to enter
You are winter

And everything that’s new has bravely surfaced
Teaching us to breathe
What was frozen through is newly purposed
Turning all things green
So it is with You
And how You make me new
With every season's change
And so it will be
As You are re-creating me
Summer, autumn, winter, spring

am sooooo happy now!!!*jumps around like some mad girl* hehe..yay!! daddy is coming home tmr!! i can't contain my joy..hehe..lalalalalala..

despite the business and all the crazy stuff going around me i seem to be happy..not only because daddy is coming home, but also because i know God is with me all the way!!

let me share my joy with everyone, Daddy is coming on home friday, yay!! rejoice with amelia!! hahaha!! super high now..hehe..

neways school's been busy with many projects coming up..so irritating, so now currently i have a proj due next week and 2 proj due the week aft..i see many sleepless nights coming up. oh well exams is coming up in like about a month, and it'll be my long awaited semestral break.

Did backstage today for 2nd svc today, think i was really blur today, and i guess i kinda didn't mix too well today, what matters most today was at least i learn from my mistakes and i realise the style for doing backstage is now different from last time. I shall improve to be better at backstage and at FOH, aim to be a professional soundman that's my goal..

Carrot, Egg or Coffee?


A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and howthings were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of figuring and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to boil. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil,without saying a word.In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl. Turning to her daughter, she asked, "Tell me what you see.""Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied.Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg. Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma.The daughter then asked, "What does it mean, mother?"Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity ... boiling water. Each reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened.The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water."Which are you?" she asked her daughter. "When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffeebean?"Think of this: Which am I?Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with theheat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, afinancial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter andtough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water,the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot,it releases the fragrance and flavor. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you.When the hour is the darkest and trials are their greatest, do you elevate yourself to another level? How do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?May you have enough happiness to make you sweet, and enough hope tomake you happy.The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything;they just make the most of everything that comes along their way. Thebrightest future will always be based on a forgotten past; you can'tgo forward in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches.
It's easier to build a child than repair an adult.

2005 has been a great year. a year where i've learnt many things, like going to NT survey(somehow it feels like i din go for it in 2005 but in 2004), going for the class really enlightened me alot in many aspects yea, really thank god for tat.
2005 also had been a year of transition, many changes happened like changing from North D to North F and from NF to YWAM, transition from secondary school to poly. Changing from sec sch to poly is really different at first couldn't get use to it, thank God i found some great frens in my class, but the sad thing is we're gonna be split up in year 2..due diff specialisation.
really want to thank God for various ppl in my life, Zing, Ruth, Pris, HuiLi, Joanne, Weiling, Susi, Royston, they've really made a great impact in my life whether if its in a direct or indirect way. I thank God for the peeps in YWAM too, i feel so blessed to be serving God with u guys and gals.